How to Step Up the Career Ladder whilst Being a Mother

Nowadays, we don’t doubt that people in the workplace recognise how hard it is to juggle being a mother and having a career. It’s not really a surprise: with 75% of mothers are now in the careers, we are clearly showing that we are out there trying to make it work for ourselves and our families. However, as mothers, we know that the common thought in the workplace is that we’re there out of necessity rather than our personal ambition or enjoyment. Talking about long term objectives and career goals just doesn’t seem to enter the conversation as much. Instead questions about mothers’ abilities to ‘manage’ are at the fore – and whilst welcomed (it was worse!) – they aren’t exactly the most forward looking and inspirational of pep-talks.

 To overcome this, you need a clear plan.

Central to this is owning your position, being confident and focusing on your strengths. It got you to where you are today after all.

Secondly is your ability to build a network. Being “Self-made” is a myth and we shouldn’t shy away from leaning on others (after all, we’re relied upon on a daily – if not hourly – basis by our families!). You need contacts to help you comes across the right opportunities at the right time.

Last but not least, organisation skills. Managing your career alongside your family needs grade-A organisation. Nothing fancy, just some simple steps to keep you on top of every day and ensure you are moving in the right direction (on both fronts!)

Focus on Your Strengths

Returning to work after Maternity Leave is when our confidence can be at its lowest. Naturally, there have been significant changes at home and at work. It can make even the most confident of us feel out of place or behind the herd. It is during this time when it is even more important to take time to reflect on your past successes, and what you did to achieve your goals to remind yourself about your strengths and abilities.

If you’ve had extensive feedback or a deeply analytical psychometric testing in prior roles, then this may not be too difficult; you’ll have evidence showing you specifically where to focus. Unfortunately, however, a lot of us haven’t and/or rely on subjective feedback constrained by previous members biases or overly-focused ‘areas for development’ conversations.

Where this is the case (and it’s probably most of us), think back to your biggest achievements in work. De-construct each of them to identify what the 2-3 key things that made it successful. What was it that really made a difference to the outcome? Do it on different achievements and identify the themes. Then once you have these themes, validate them with those closest to you; family, girlfriends, partners. The people that you know you best know your strengths and won’t be shy about telling you. You may also find things that you didn’t know about that you can draw upon more.

Through this exercise you’ll identify your strengths. These are what you should be drawing on and without the need for any expensive courses or tutorials; their your INA strengths if we may (sorry not sorry :-))

Communicate

When you feel you are ready to move to the next level, make sure your manager isn’t caught off guard. Be vocal about your aspirations. Establish your objectives in partnership with your line manager and regularly revisit these to show your progress. Demonstrating the ownership of your own career and persistence in the goal is what will drive results.

Being specific about the value you bring not only helps you to hone in on this in your day-to-day. It also helps to clearly communicate that value as part of your personal brand.

Build a Network of Advocates

Career progression requires advocates who value your work, appreciate your strengths and see the potential in you. In particular for mothers, this group of advocates is key to ensuring that we are aware of broader opportunities – looking out for us when our confidence may not be at its highest.

Seek out powerful advocates, whether they are peers or more senior colleagues; both can be influential over career progression in your organisation. Your peers may not be directly responsible for promotion calls, but they can link you into the right conversations at the right times. Its impossible for you to be in every conversation, especially if you have a flexible working arrangement. So ensure that the people you know are championing your cause in your absence.

In terms of senior colleagues, be vocal about your aspirations. Establish your objectives in partnership with your line manager and regularly revisit these to show your progress.  Demonstrating the ownership of your own career and persistence in the goal is what will drive results. And remember, being part of their team means that your success is their success. Build on that by asking what they can do to help you fulfil them. Give them a vested interest in your development so they spread the word!

 If they’re the jealous type? Bypass them! You can’t win every battle so instead, change tactics; speak to senior people who you do respect and it will soon become obvious that you’re mission can not be stopped by an insecure individual who you will soon be flying past.

 Having a diverse group of advocates is hugely positive; they are your cheerleaders! It helps make career conversations easier when people in different parts of the business respect what you do. Women advocating women is truly powerful as we can more easily relate to the challenges faced and approaches to succeed. But don’t rely on that. Have champions from different age groups, genders, departments, star-signs (too-far?!) – there is no limit. You’ll be surprised that success rate of just reaching out to someone you find inspirational and ask them to meet for coffee to learn about their work, share your experiences and ask for advice on how they think that you can succeed

Structure and Organisation

Most of the above points are relevant to all career progression, regardless of having a family or not. They are just super-charged as it requires extra focus. One aspect which is really crucial specifically for us mothers is clear structure and organisation to your day.

Starting and ending the day with family is always a good principle to have. It will not always be possible, but have the target and aim to achieve it as reguarly as possible for your circumstance. You will enjoy and value the occassions you are not (we all need a change of scenery some time) but if you’re like us, family is still number 1 and keeping that family connection will help you remember what you’re doing the late nights and early mornings for.

Beyond that, everyone has a different working pattern. Whilst it may be calls in the car on the way in to maximise every time slot, another may involve usig that time for a headspace related podcast. Some of us may not want to email after 5pm to swtich-off, whilst others may leave early and log on late when they are free of distraction. The point is not what structure you use, but that you define one and keep to it. Even scheduling in when you do child admin, plan weekend events, do the meal plan – its not boring, its effective.

And if you are flexible working, maybe on reduced hours, organisation should not extend to “how do I fit 5 days into 4”. You’re not getting paid for it! Organisation means what are the things you are going to prioritise and what are the things that may have to drop. Decide this, agree it with your manager and HR, and move on. The one thing you realise as mother is that life is too short and too busy to be doing things that aren’t important.

Ina suggests, think to yourself ‘what are the first few words I want people to describe me as?’ Focus on what they are and how you display these on the daily.

Ina says:

Remember our rules:

• Own your position, be confident and focus on your strengths. As a mother they’ve got stronger, not weaker.
• Build a network from peers and senior leaders and actively encourage them to champion your strengths in your absence
• Be disciplined and keep to a proper structure – on a daily basis. Managing your career alongside your family needs A-grade organisation.